105%

Issue #60

by 105%-O-Matic May 13, 2008


Original music by this sick new band my brother's in.

Senior Superlatives at San Dimas High
- Most Likely to Marry Medieval Princesses
- Most Likely to Save the World With Rock and Roll
- Most Excellent
-Chase Mitchell
I wish I lived in Alabama so my state was at the top of drop down menus. No other reason.
-Travis Morton
I recently tried Trident whitening gum. That sh*t is powerful. Immediately after chewing I bought all 11 seasons of Frasier on DVD.
-Conor McKeon
Porno Pizzeria Policy
Thirty minutes or less or you don't have to blow the delivery driver.
-Patrick Cassels
Lord of the Rings in One Minute
Gandalf: You must destroy the one ring of power.
Frodo: How?
Gandalf: I'll summon my eagle friend. He'll fly you over Mt. Doom and you can throw in the ring.
Frodo: Thanks!
-Clete Smith
They say Hillary is the candidate of beer drinkers and Obama is the candidate of wine drinkers. I like both candidates a lot. I can't remember why.
-Tom Sunnergren
Questions Questions Questions
- Why do people drive on a parkway, and park on a driveway?
- Why is it called luggage on an airplane, and planeage on an airlug?
- Why is it when you fix a house it's called landscaping, but when you house a fix its land callscaping?
-Amir Blumenfeld
Fun To Use When You Don't Need Them, Terrible To Use When You Do
- Adderall
- Wheelchairs
- Guns
-Streeter Seidell
Click here to submit your own 105%.
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